love's tough

love's tough

Maybe it’s the rain. Maybe it’s the extra time I have to sit alone and think. I found the last few days exceptionally draining and tiring. It’s not so much the physical exhaustion; it’s the sudden emotional burn out that took me by surprise. There are even moments when I find it hard to breathe.

I feel an urgent need to get away for a day, to be alone. I’m tired of trying so hard, of being in someone else’s shoes. I feel let down by myself. I think I haven’t been loving myself enough.

Relationships are never easy. Recently, in the face of life and its madness, love seemed especially tough. Promises are rendered tiny by priorities. And when these burdens aren’t mine to cast aside, I simply don’t know what to do. There is nothing I can do.

But I don’t want to be the one who gave up on someone I love. I don’t want to look back and realize I didn’t try hard enough.

I’m torn between me and you. But there’s no third way out. What do I do? Do we have to lose before we learn?